Amazed

Today at last, i manage to catch a few breaths, sitting down , doing things other than labworks.
And somehow, i felt i need to listen to some songs to unwind. These days had been tough for weak weak me.

And i remember this song: Amazed by desperation band





Simple but lovely song. Its my favourite back in college..and now listening back, it touches me: it touches me to know there is a God that remains unchanged through time even though we change with time, be it big or small. No wonder the Bible placed so much importance in asking us to remember. Especially on His many characters that stood the test of time. A tool that keeps us achored and stand firm in the environment whixh often we could not control.

Now and then, there is this thought that comes to my mind when i faced difficulties or feel i cant walk anymore - on asking why cant God stop being so nice to me, so i can get what i want. Why must He be so good that He only meet my needs and not all my wants. After all, its the wants that we human often placed too much importance on, eg money, stable relationship and easy going life. But, fortunately, i am still glad God have the foresight we lack, tough as life throws at us. He meets all needs, but not all wants.

Ok, maybe i am talking nonsense that doesnt makes sense.=p But it doesnt matter, as long as at you get the message that God is good=)

Saturday blues

"Lalalalala.. raindrops falling on my head." Outside it was raining..not an exactly cheerful picture to be in right? And worse thing is i am stuck here in the lab, on a Saturday, even though i have and will continue to spend my days and nights in this place for the rest of the week days.

Not that i love to complain, on the contrary I am so tired of it actually. I had reached a stage whereby i didnt know how to voice my troubles anymore. I psyched myself to feel happy each time i woke up, but then the cycles auto repeat itself during the day. In all, i just felt it not worthwhile.. after spending 3 and 1/2 years in my pharmacy course getting great results after lots of hard works, and now nearing the finishing line, my classification is detemined by lots of factors outside my control. Ya, i admit i have got a high ambition, but really, i dont mind getting just sufficient if my results had been not good all along.. but just not screw up at this end point.

Anyway, these days, i felt really thankful by lots of patient and lovely souls out there. Without them, i didnt know how i would be now. Talking about them, i remembered one wise sentence i would always keep in my heart from one of my friend.

Below are the context of the quote. Wont mention who is that but it cracks me up everytime i remember=) like now. ..Amazing, how human can brighten another one's life, right?

Scene: on ironing trousers
Me: Do u want any iron, i can lend to you if you want.
Anonymous: oh no no no., i dont need iron........i shall just use my body heat.
Me: o_O
Anonymous: And i could condition them as well...using my body oil.
Me:=_=

Wow, talk about eco-friendly to the max!=p

All things silver...

Every cloud has a silver lining...

Yes, Gillian, you got to believe that. Even though the stupid project leads to nowhere, even though the supervisor dont understand and no help at most time, even though you are working on a very very toxic drug which you have probably accidentally inhale and touch a number of times without realizing now. Yes, even though you have always got lousy pig skins, with no certainty of starting the REAL experiments yet though you always stay the whole day in the lab with the deadline drawing near. Yes, that also includes no time for your own, doing other important things too many to number here.

So, yours truly is not going to complain here further. Instead, let me share with you a touching story i heard last sunday if you havent heard. To inspire others as well as to help me look at the right place.

I called it...tadaa...:

The Silversmith Story

(haha, oops, not very creative i know but content more important right?=p)

Malachi 3:3 He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver; he will purify the Levites and refine them like gold and silver. Then the LORD will have men who will bring offerings in righteousness.

Once, there was this lady who heard that God is just like a refiner and purifier, but did not understand much. So, what better way to gain insight into this than to visit the silversmith? Therefore, off she went to visit the local silversmith.

Without telling the silversmith the purpose of her visit, she interviewed the guy. "Could you explain to me how do you purify the silver in your hand?" In a simplify version, the silversmith replied, "well, one important condition is that you have to put the silver into the hottest part of the fire, for it to be refined."

"Oh, so while doing all this, what do you actually need to do. I mean do you need to be there all the time?" probed the lady further.

"Yup, i need to be there all the time during the refining and purifying process..to keep watch over it closely. Because you see, the silver cant be underheated. Nor can it be overheated, or else the silver would have gone without hope of recovering. But if not heated enough, the silver wont be perfect."

Feeling intrigued by now, the lady asked one last question. "So, how can you be sure that the silver purification is complete and to stop the process at the exact time?"

"Well, that is VERY easy. The moment i can see my reflection on the silver, i know it is done."

Simple story i think but with profound impact. How often a time we think we are all alone in our struggles, feeling maybe like the silver in the hot fire, with no way out. But it is so humbling to know actually in the midst of all these, there is a God who keep watch so closely. The timing in His hand is always perfect - not a moment too early, and never ever late.

Happy pancake day everyone!=D

Events of the past weeks - part 3

NUMBER 3: Valentine's Day 2009

I often wonder how this day came about. Who is this St valentine that sends the world crazy - shops capitalising on this occasion, radios blasting romantic love music non-stop and images of love eg: balloons almost at every corner you turned?

So to satisfy my curiosity, i went on a mission during my lab session (oops, of course i also did my research at the same time..haha. this is called multitask =p ). The fruit of my labour is summarised as this - The history of Valentine's Day — and its patron saint — is shrouded in mystery. haha. How nice it would be if last time whilst in secondary school, my history book is like this.

Though not certain, there are three people recognised as St V by the catholic church in history. One legend is about this priest who married off lovers despite being forbidden by the roman king who issued decree during war time that young men should not marry - apparently for the reason that men will be stronger warriors if unmarried. Noble as it seems, he was eventually executed due to this. Owwh, poor guy but at least he was a hero!

Another legend is about this guy who set christians free from the horrible situations in jail. This guy apparently fell in love with the jailer's daughter, and before his death, wrote the first love letter signing off as "from your valentine", which of course is a famous phrase now.

When it comes to valentine, being single, it is just like any other day for me. But i had to admit i regarded it with more dread as the years pass by. Probably very few people in the same boat who can identify with me and understand without judging, that there is a feeling of sadness that i could not even describe. Well, i am only human i guess...

But, reflecting back to this day, i am thankful for the cheerful moments that God brought along on this day to keep the blueness of my day from turning a darker shade. First of all, i would like to especially thanks eunice here for being there. You just proved that words dont have to be many, just the thoughts and hearts that counts. You open my eyes to realize it can also be a day to remember and to celebrate the love we have with the people around us. Thank you again;)

That day, the 60 colum girls also managed to have a girls' night out. Finally after so many months of living under the same roof! haha.

Yeah, 60 Colum girls!

I like this photo: one reason because it shows increasing eyes size from left to right. haha. Tlo commented i was not in photography mood, but hey, big eyes mom + small eyes dad = middle eyes me!!=p the right family portrait!

Hmm, asians are not asians unless we put on some FOOD photos to salivate on, right?!

oOOoo, Sashimi and spider maki. Just love the japanese food: they are generally healthy but delicious! Itadakimasu

Haha, so sweet and funny, but eunice and i were like =.=". lol. Guess where did the flower comes from?! (clues: scroll up!)

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Apart from dinner, the one occasion that made my day or rather weekend is dear Vien vien which came all the way from Notts. Havent seen her in years and busyness in life makes our conversations far in between since we left college. But, time, as cruel as it is sometimes, will never ever change a true friendship.

Awww, dearie vien vien that inspires me a lot=) HeeHee, sorry no other photos at this moment so hence putting up this blurrie one.

That night, i had a mini taylorian reunion at home. It felt like the good old days when we had time to chill up together in college. We talked and talked until pass midnight, about anything and everything under the sky. Tired as i was and cold as the night was, there was a warmth among us as we catch up on time pass since we all last met. Hmm, made me wonder when can i had that privilege again?;)

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NUMBER 4: My Master Mission Impossible

Guess what is THIS?:

Its PIGGIES' EARS! Okok, these were not as gross as what i got for mine this week..

Now, presenting.........

eeEEEWWW, look! They are so BLACK and very hairy! See, even bigger than my face somemore! The hairs bit makes me so "geli" - with colour ranging from ginger, brown to black. Believe me, i had shaved them a couple of times, but the skins i got looks more like black porcupine than pink skin resembles human. After excising the skin, there are lots of tiny weeny marks on my labcoat! Dirty dirty *shakes head*. The worst thing is after the ordeal that last hours, none of the skin is usable =.=

Never mind, at least i achieve one thing: my fruit of patience is growing. lol

Ok, now guess WHO is this???

He is the one who keeps us in the lab! Haha, LM has a part time job of being a paparazzi! Our supervisor can be described as a blind leading two young blind fellows behind in his projects. But, one thing great, at least he is funny!=p

Events of the past weeks - part 2

I know i said i want to kill lots and lots of birds in my last post about what happen during the past few weeks. But, unfortunately i was not in the best hunter mood.. so now, i shall pick up from where i left.=)

NUMBER 2: snow in Cardiff. 2/2/2009

Woohoo, snow snow snow..I think i should count myself really blessed.

I could still recall some of my english housemates comments during my first year, "whoa, you really wish for snow don't you? Ok, will pray and wait with you." then " Gillian! You are so lucky, you know this is your first year and you get to see it. Its not every year you get to see snow, you know."

And now looking back, the Lord had been good to me and let me see snow for a continuous 4 years here in UK. Though not every year was heavy, but, hey they are still SNOW! Snow that i dont get back in malaysia and can only be seen in drama like winter sonata. So VERY the precious u know..lol..

Anyway, after much dissapointments after a series of cold snaps in UK this year, the snow finally paid Cardiff a visit on 2nd of FEB. Can still remember how excited i was. If not for my tiredness that night due to lab works, i would have went out and played. Instead, i just took shower and put on my most comfy pyjamas, then sat in front of the window and watched the snowy scene outside. At the same time, i remembered calling home and said, "mommy and daddy, i am so happy now..*giggles*..because it snows outside!" Lol. I think my parents must have shaken their head and thought "this girl still havent grown up!" haha

colum road

However, still wishing to go and play with snow, i managed that night to arrange a "date" with several people in the morning. But, unfortunately one look outside in the morning, the snow already looked kind of melted! Dissapointed, i reluctantly got back to bed, wide awake.

But later all thanks to Kenneth who called "Gillian! Hey, bute park very beautiful you know, still very white and got lots and lots of snow! Come and join us!" And thats when i decided to wake up LM and TLO and got ready to go and have fun. Frankly i felt tired then but excitement got the better of me.=)

The 3 pharmies were all ready in their winter gears.. Look at TLo, love her "innocent just woke up look" with pink stuffs to BITS! And the background of sunrise is so beautiful! Tell me how often can we went OUT and took photos at 8AM?!=D

On the way to bute park, LM and i kept forgetting our destination and played!

Look closely at the tree. The one tree that was still green among all the 'botak' tree. ~salute~

Cute dog with coat. so obedient somemore, when the master said stop from afar, he just stopped there without moving. Kind of reminds me to be like that with God^-^

*Awwwww*

Events of the past weeks.

Been so busy lately, that i havent blogged here for weeks, even though i know i have promised to blog about CNY before chap goh meh. But its better late than never right?

Well, i will try making this less wordy since i intend to summarise a few events that happen lately in this post alone. If i dont, dunno when i am free to blog about them, so am killing lots and lots of birds now with one stone=p

NUMBER 1: Chinese new year. 2009

Its moomoo year finally! It all started when i mentioned to both LM and Eunice that i want a proper chinese dinner in restaurants spend with friends, seeing i never had one be4 in UK and this is cny would be my last chance of having one! Then, lovely eunice, being ever so resourceful, suggest here:

Whoa, seriously, the food here is super duper delicious! Its buffet styled, but unlike most buffet here, that offers you substandard restaurant food, this one is different. You can order anything u want, including free flow dim sum and guess what, dessert! their mango pudding is simply..Yummy yummy=)

To illustrate how delicious it is, have a look yourself. Even though, i have to say, photos dont even do justice to the taste!

This is the gang of lovely people i went with. I like the first photo of looking at the menu, it seems we are having a serious meeting. That shows how difficult it is to decide what to order first.lol

But in the end, we manage to solve the problem.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~which is ~~~~~~~~~~~~

by ordering food like emperor/empress as we feel like!

Siao Long pau! Delicious and juicy inside!

Lobster! We were so excited to see it..(poor lobsters) Look at Connie, she was crazy till she forgot to look at camera! lol

Busy business going on...

Oops, sorry, just realized i dont have much food photos to salivate on!

If i have to choose, my personal favourites got to be the crispy duck pancake and siao long pau. Though i am also excited to eat the yam rolls and..ooya guess what? I learn to love the beef dishes there, which i strongly suspect is NOT beef at all. lol

its time to be like the python after a meal

Thanks future lawyers for spending CNY with me: Sheryl, it is so good to meet you after such a long time! and eunice..heehee, i will definitely miss spending cny with "twin" like you. You know what i mean!;)

And also everyone else: Lay Ming, TLo, Kenneth and Cutie, Lip Sing, Janet, Connie, and Jed.. the cny makan makan wont be as enjoyable without you.=)

Other CNY related events (with food of course!=)) are:

The steamboat of the English Section in church. Talking about which, i was asked to be in charge of this group, called "the winner". Just want to say u guys are great, though we are not the winner of the game, but hey, we have fun!

The CNY lunch buffet organised by Cardiff Malaysian Society at Cardiff Bay

~Fellow Sarawakians that i am thankful to bump into in far far away UK! (from left) Roselyn, Sandra, Xiu Mei and Connie. The 2nd photo feature Bumiputera models. lol

Last but not least, CNY lunch at Ichiban, made the more merrier by Lion Dance! Quoting Hui Ann,"Spot Me!" in the 1st photo. To be frank, i am still a bit scared by this fake lion.. i still cant watch one alone, have to hold on to somebody i know. So Cutie, you saved my day=p

Overall, i enjoyed the start of the ox year!

snow... do u see me waiting for you??=D

Weather forecast for 2/2/09: Light snow.

Woohoo, its going to snow. Hopefully the weatherman is correct!!!

On a side note, havent been able to update my blog. Lots of things to write about, but either i am too lazy, busy or tired. Well, will get myself to update things about cny, hopefully before chap goh mei ends!